Fifty Two

Originally posted 3rd October 2011

Wow…blog number fifty two…if that had been in one year it would be pretty impressive… as it is fifty two blogs is good going for me whose previous attempts at blogging have run to may be two or possibly three posts at a push! So you could say that this small achievement in the blogging ¬†world makes me happy…which neatly shoehorns into my point for today which is happiness. (yes I know..tenusous link…but you should be used to that by now)

so happiness…is it the elusive goal at the end of a rainbow or are we just looking in the wrong place for it? Is it the be all and end all and once we get there we will get our happy ever after…well that is what we are taught isn’t it? Movies with happy endings, fairy tales where cinderella marries a prince and they all live happily ever after…we are brought up to believe that it is a Disney world and if we endure enough hardship and talking furniture we will eventually battle through to our goal of a “happy ending”… so…the news flash is…this is not how it works…now…I am not going into a cynical anti Disney blog or even a face up to the harsh realities of life blog, I am actually going to propose that we start looking somewhere else for our happiness. Starting with my photo…is was a tricky one to pick…a photo of happiness so I chose one that made me happy when I took it and makes me happy now:

This little bird makes me happy, seeing her and her other little bird friends is a small thing that makes me happy…maybe not for ever…but for the duration of me watching the birds on the feeder and that, my friends is the point!

Happiness is not a destination! We need to stop making our happiness conditional on other peoples actions, or on material acquisition or meeting a set of requirements. It doesn’t matter whether they are self-imposed requirements or imposed by society, there are a lot of people (myself included at times) who base the measure of their happiness on something happening…how many time have you heard (or thought) “I’d be happy if…I lost weight, or If I had a new pc, or if So and so would be my friend or stop complaining or something”

It is time for a new outlook…happiness is a mood…it happens at different times and has different triggers…and yes there are different degrees of it just as there are different degrees of sadness and they won’t all feel the same, I think we just need to get better at recognising them!

Having a great husband, taking a great picture, or seeing a bird on the feeder or someone liking something I have made or just being reminded that another person is thinking of me…these things all make me happy…sometimes for a few minutes sometimes for longer. None of these things stop sad things happening or stop some work days being rubbish…but they do counterbalance them!

If we looked for the positive in things a little more often, if we searched for and fond the little things that make us happy as well as the big things then we might find we have a lot more happiness in our lives…at least a lot more that we recognise!

It could be something as simple as a smily face made of buttons or, text message from a friend or a really good breakfast but look for the positives.

It is easy to remember the negative, easy to write on Facebook about all the bad that is happening and all the little annoyances that we face. If we looked at the other side of things and searched for the good then we might start believing it a little bit more. It will not take away the big badnesses that happen…but it might just make the days better.

Ok…I know…it is easy to say, but hard to do…but it has got to be worth a try!

So today the things that are making me happy are: Morris dancing practice tonight, and the giant dough buns I made last night.

As well as that the single watch I am wearing is bright yellow…in contrast to my black and grey outfit…that should make anyone smile.

Three: Concerning inspiring Americans and Stonehenge

Originally posted February 1st 2011

I have made it to a third post…this is something of a record for me!

As yesterday’s post may have indicated, there have been some considerable low points over the last year! I have just been forced to think back yet again to this time last year and it made me think about how the most mundane things can bring back memories, and how the smallest actions often have much greater effects than anyone thinks. It was this introspective moment that lead me to look back over the years photos and find this:

Stonehenge_small_pic

It seemed the appropriate picture as it reminded me that in the midst of sadness there can still be inspiring moments. This dawn trip to Stonehenge was on 17th April 2010, the day after my birthday and at a point in the year when I didn’t really know how my brain was functioning! Looking back on this is an inspiration for several reasons some more obvious than others. The first is the setting, Stonehenge at sunrise in amongst the stones is an experience that not too many people have these days. It is a beautiful setting and if you throw in the perfect light and lack of aircraft trails due to an Icelandic volcano it all added up to be an opportunity that will not be repeated in a hurry.

Second and slightly less obvious is the series of events that allowed me to be invited to experience this. The Stonehenge Trip was organised by an American colleague of mine (who has incidentally probably seen more of the UK than most residents) for the group of American ex-pats who were living in Farnborough. Now to all that know me this will be obvious but I am not an American ex-pat but I was welcomed into the group and invited to accompany them on this trip. Now this small action meant a lot to me, I am aware that I was filling an empty space, but the fact that someone who I had known only a few months thought enough about me to know that I might enjoy the trip made me happy.

The third inspiring thought is that in the saddest time of my life, this action made me happy. The invitation touched me and despite everything I enjoyed the day. So the point that i have been arriving at in a very round about way is that even in the midst of inconceivable sadness there is still hope, and it is worth remembering that you don’t have to make extravagant gestures to have a considerable effect on a person’s life.

On a completely unrelated note…I am still wearing 2 watches and no-one has mentioned it so I am going to carry on!